I am not sane.

I was not allowed to watch The Wizard of Oz until I was in High School, and only then because I had to watch if for a class. Why? Because my mother is a very smart woman and she knows that I have bad dreams and that flying monkeys and green witches may not have been the best thing to assault my brain with.
So why, then, knowing that, have I consciously chosen to focus a good deal of my studies on film? Why did I just submit a proposal to a professor to write a research paper on the implications of the portrayal of genocide in motion pictures? There's a reason that I haven't seen any of the movies that I referenced in my proposal... Hotel Rwanda, Schindler's List... maybe I should just give up on sleeping for the rest of the semester. I'm completely crazy...
On the sweeter side, Ranger Man said "just bring them here for Thanksgiving, and we'll watch them together..." too bad I can't wait that long.

UPDATE:
looks like my proposal was shot down... well, not so much shot down but I was given the "you can do it, but it'll be difficult, I've seen people try, and no one succeeds..." speech from Professor H. last night. bleh. Now I have to figure out what to write about, looks like I'm not going to be able to get around writing a historical research paper -- eek! I don't know HOW to write a historical research paper!

Too Hot.

I am ssoo not cut out for this whole tropical climate thing... It is too hot to do anything.

This whole week was overcast, so it was bearable, but today the sun was back, and I acted like a slug all day. Plus, I'm all out of Otter Pops, which I truly thank God for... his gift to the starving college students of hot places. (That was not at all disrespectful, I am truly thankful for Otter Pops.)

And the roommies and I are due to have dinner at the Landlord's house tonight- is that weird? I'm not sure... on the one hand I will have a square meal, which I haven't had in a while, but on the other hand - awkward! Plus, I should be doing a ton of reading, etc that I didn't do today because it was too hot to concentrate... the roommies have pledged to do their best to keep this as brief as possible. I hope it works out that way.

Boys are Weird.

Ranger Man and I have been tossing back and forth the idea of getting married for a bit now. I don't want to go through another deployment as a girlfriend, and well- he's still trying to get used to the fact that he's got a girlfriend... so it's been interesting, to say the least. But even before his school had started I'd really backed off- I mean, obviously, I can't force him to do anything, and why would I want to? I had made my point, we had some discussion, and I was going to let it be. And now that he's mega-stressed, I was really not even worried about it at all. He can't get deported again until he's done at school, so I don't need to worry about it right now...

Today, we were talking about the copious amounts of books that I'm collecting, and how I wasn't looking forward to moving... and he said (I'm quoting, because yes, I asked him to repeat this...) "Well by that time maybe your hubby will be able to help." My what?! I thought that I was just a girlfriend? I was getting used to the girlfriend idea. It is not nice to tease girls that way! Not that I'm obsessing about it... but really... that was the most bizarre thing for him to say. what a weirdo.

The Kite Runner- Part 2

Here is an update (via NYT) on the situation with the filming of The Kite Runner. Well, I suppose not the filming, but the poor kid that got drafted to play Hassan. He's not such a poor kid any more I guess. I just think this whole situation is fascinating, and I wish that I knew more about it. What did the contracts say? Is it true that the families didn't receive a script? In short- it seems that both sides have a lot to gain by deception, either in the beginning as the family says, or now as the family wants out of A-Stan... It's just fascinating.

On the other hand, reading the book was traumatic enough for me, I'm not sure if I could ever see a movie about it...

The letter writing brigade (me!)

Ranger Man is trying so hard, and I wish that I could help him... but of course what can I do, even if we were married there wouldn't be anything that I could do- so I regress back to what I do best... writing letters. I am a heck of a letter writer, let me tell you. The poor guy is probably going to be mortified- it's one thing to get bright pink letters from your girlfriend when you're deployed, is it something else when you're at school? Is it still a good thing, or is it a bad thing? I'm not sure. Either way, he didn't tell me to stop sending them, thus I will continue, I suppose. I just hope they're enough!

Again.

One of the things that I always forget about, until it happens, during a deployment or TDY is how much I like saying good night to Ranger Man, and hearing him say Good Night to me before I go to sleep. When you're a crazy insomniac with scary dreams, you tend to rely on positive routines in order to fall asleep at night (because really, is there any other motivation?), and my routine which was oh so nice has been.... suspended for the time being, again. Hooah.

Because of some significant spatial/location issues, it is extremely rare that Ranger Man and I get to say our good nights in person, so it is normally by phone anyways, but it is definitely something that I have gotten used to and it is one of the first things that is hitting me about this super secret Army school... I miss saying good night, and hearing it. It's just not the same coming from my Roommates...

Unlike the last few weeks/months, he is busy. I know that he isn't "deported" Which is our euphemism (I'll save that for a later post) for deployment, I know that he's safe and he's going to be safe for the whole time he's there, but at the same time, his cell phone is very turned off most of the time (he made sure to tell me that would be the case, so that I could stop worrying...), and even when he can talk, he's tired and it's deportment mode for me on the phone- everything is happy and fine and nothing is wrong...

There are of course, other things that I miss too, but that is the one that I can put into words the most concretely. It's a little difficult to explain, but there is something innately comforting to talk to the one you love right before you go to sleep, even if it is always just by phone. However, it looks like for the next few months, I am on my own for the good nights. Maybe we can tape-record it and I could listen to it before bed...

Financial Aid Woes

I have spent (so far) six full weeks being yanked around by Financial Aid... And there is no end in sight. Six weeks ago they told me everything was in order, they were just waiting for the funds to come through... last friday when I still hadn't seen anything, I was (rudely) told that I needed to verify I'd received my BA -- What? So the transcript that I paid $20 for and sent in with my application doesn't count? When I explained to them that they merely needed to read my transcript and they would determine that it did indeed reflect the award of my degree, I was then assured that everything was fine, and it would be 1-2 weeks and I would see the check...

I got another bill yesterday. I called this morning and was shooed off the phone with the same "we're just waiting for the funds" routine that I got six weeks ago! Oh. My. Gosh. I don't know if Financial Aid is really that hard, or if this is more evidence of the delight-fulness of this Island...