Really- yesterday was horrible and I don't care to repeat it. I'm a worrier anyways, and when there really is something to worry about, it isn't pleasant.
But, throughout the whole thing, when he was sick and when we went to the hospital, I kept thinking to myself "I'm so glad that I'm here and he doesn't have to be by himself." I told him that yesterday when we (briefly) talked on the phone. Not that this made it all worth it or anything, but he replied to me that he felt the same way- that he was glad I was there too. It sounds sappy, but that was a really validating and wonderful thing to hear. Sometimes I'm afraid that he just takes care of me, and that I'm just along for the ride and it was really great to be able to help him, and for him to really recognize and feel that I could do something so tangible and concrete for him. But as great as it was, it wasn't great enough to wish that sort of situation on us on a regular basis. No thank you. Still, it was a nice ending to an icky day, a silver lining in a really dark cloud.
I'm still pretty sleepy, maybe later this weekend I'll write about the guy I met in the ER... it was an interesting night.