Monday, December 21, 2009

It's a wrap.

Driving across the country was probably one of the most empowering experiences of my life. Not that I want to do it again, or that I think anyone who's feeling low should hop in a car... but in my situation, it worked wonders. I navigated myself across completely unknown territory, literally taking control of my life and moving forward.

Here's one of the only pictures I took on our trip- Webster perched in a hotel room in California.



So I drove and felt happy and accomplished and proud of myself.

Then... we got here.

Ugh. All of my belongings, me, Webster, a cot to sleep on, random other stuff and my brother's computer/computer desk all shoved into one teeny tiny little bedroom. And of course, no more cleaning has occurred.

Finding an affordable apartment here that (a) takes cats and (b) doesn't require a 12 month lease is proving to be a very difficult task. I got SO frustrated today, but then I went and fondled some yarn at TWO local yarn stores which made me feel better. (Yay! There are yarn stores here!)
I've got an apartment to view a studio tomorrow, so cross your fingers that it will work out, or really, that something will work out.

Mostly though, other than the frustration, I still feel really great. I may not have as much as I had when Ranger Man was providing every thing for me, but at least what I have is truly mine, and I have to work for it. I'm in control now, not any one else. I do what's best for me and for Webster, and I truly believe that was coming home. Plus, I am grateful (even if it doesn't sound like it) that my dad let me come here. Not everyone even has a little room to share with a cat and a computer. I am lucky.

For tomorrow... the tale of the immense gratification when your ex-boyfriend from when you were a senior in High School really does look you up 7 years later. I *told* him that he wouldn't be able to stop thinking about me! Hahaha. stay tuned.

1 comment:

Cookie said...

I am SO proud of you! And Webster because it takes a good kitty to go on that drive and not take hostages. ;^)

Just think of it. In a few years, you will be able to look back at that Christmas you had in a tiny room with Webster and a computer and smile at how far you've come.

xo