Monday, August 4, 2008

so timely

Wow... talk about timely.

I recently met a spouse. Not through Ranger Man- so someone who knew nothing about me or him or us... merely asked why I moved here (like everyone else in this city, it seems like) and I told the truth: "My boyfriend is in the Army." This is after she asked me where I was from originally.

The dripping-with-disdain response? "Oh, so... are you planning on getting married? Or just trying it out?" wtf? first of all, it's none of your dang business if you're going to use that tone. Second of all- um yeah. I moved ALL THE WAY ACROSS THE COUNTRY on a freaking whim- to 'try it out.' Right.

Okay, but on the same-ish note, I was thinking today... Wouldn't it make much more sense for all those spouses that think I either need to get married or get lost to encourage my non-spouse relationship? I'm doing all the same things as them, taking care of my soldier, but we're not getting BAH, I'm not taking up their precious appointments at the hospital, I'm not making their lines at the commissary longer... all of those resources that I'm not getting- now there's more for them. Shouldn't they be encouraging that? Shouldnt the Army be encouraging that rather than pushing us into a position where they'll be doling out more money and more resources?

All those spouses that have the marry or drop mentality should really think about how much they could gain by encouraging non-traditional (ie non-spouse) relationships.

oh yeah, and all that bragging about how well I was sleeping that I did yesterday. Well, let's just say I spoke too soon on that one. Last night wasn't good.


Lindsay aka Corn said...

I cannot tell you how much I feel you on this topic.

Got here through Loquita, and the "just a girlfriend" topic.

I just moved to be with my boyfriend, who is in the Air Force, and I can't tell you how many people have asked us this.

Honestly is it any of your business??

Bette said...

Well, you can't win, because with a jerk like her, if you did get married she'd accuse you of rushing into it for the benefits. People like that aren't even worth getting angry about (and no, I don't practice what I preach!).

I've had people apologize when they found out we weren't married, as if it were some tragic dark secret. Those are the ones I wouldn't want to be friends with anyway, so it works out for all of us. :-)